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Catharsis

by Another Step Brother

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1.
Paperboy 02:47
I say "yes" for the wrong reasons They answer "no" to "have you seen him" I run away to catch my breath Ironic? Maybe a little bit Been drowning in desperation While your dousing in your religion Don't need God to find salvation They sell red wine on aisle seven And then you search the city I bet you pray he brings me Ho-o-ome Can't blame you for my behavior But, bet you wish I found your savior I'll cross my heart and hope to die Bet you that will make the father cry Paperboy, I've been carrying this for years
2.
She asks about the fact that I don't look her in the eye I tell her of my dad's calloused hands She asks me how it feels being a bit older; blaming my mother and her cold shoulders I don't know what she expected from the answers that I gave her I only talk about the things I know "You just don't want to feel so guilty" I wanna say I'm sorry, is that such a bad thing "People aren't your play thing" I caught her with her hands on my shoulders, now shes asking me to explain Outlining my skin, begging me to let her in but how much more does she want Her palm above my chest, she decides she wants to rest and I can't blame her I only talk about the things I know "How can you just leave just cos it's cloudy" It doesn't make me happy, should I say I'm sorry "But people aren't your fucking play thing"
3.
Paintchips 02:55
You've been swallowing yellow paintchips And I've been drinking gasoline You poison music that I used to love I play those songs on repeat I light a match under your old pictures But you set fire to my bones I tend to get a lot of questions But you're someone that I no longer know Got caught, you thought you told me You're leaving me to settle up the score Twisting my arm and breaking bones Can't believe you ran away from home I chase my sorrows with the thought of drinking Anything I can to keep me warm You keep it light and make conversation But you made a fire into a storm Can you account for all the money wasted My bad ideas and personal neglect You've got a lot of nerve in asking Me to buy you more cigarettes Got caught, you thought you told me You're leaving me to settle up the score Twisting my arm and breaking bones Can't believe you ran away from home Got caught, you thought you told me You're leaving me to settle up the score Twisting my arm and breaking bones You're someone that I no longer know
4.
About You 03:39
I bet you laugh at the thought that I ever believed we could be something more than Lovers out of highschool, promiscuous creatures, sinning in bleachers, outside of churches Stain glass breaths, still kissing on your neck, undress in Texas, color your hair cos you're Tired of my antics, don't know how to say it, you take the misery out on your skin Draw new lines to define yourself, tell everyone you meet that they mean nothing And everything at once, you're everything at once, tell the whole world that I meant nothing But this is about you and not about me And this is about you and not about me I bet you laugh when you know how heavily revised all my work is Try to find new language to paint you, but only using your favorite colors Convincing myself that my vernacular was always mine, and you cant have it But even my name is riddled with your God damn influence And I'm sure you use that to your advantage to illustrate just how derivative I am Stealing lines from your play book, meeting new people I always lie about who I am But this is about you and not about me And this is about you and not about me Cos when I wake up, don't wanna know where you've been And this is about you and not about me You caught me in the middle of the street We always knew some day we'd meet, We used to say it'd be a coffeeshop Not at a party when we're both drunk And when the wind blows knocking trees down It crushes my skull exposing my scalp But this is about you and not about me And this is about you and not about me Cos when I wake up, don't wanna know where you've been And this is about you and not about me
5.
I don't think anyone's as happy as they pretend to be online Cos I've been trying to impress you every day of my life And if I'm on to something let me make it clear I live my life filled with fear That you are, the last person who saw me smile You are, the last person who's understood that I will self destruct if you go away But pictures don't show that pain I don't think I'm as broken as I write myself to be Cos I've always had a habit of exaggerating And if I've finally hit the nail on the head I'll rewrite all the words I've said That you are, the last person who broke me down You are, the last mistake I had to walk away from if I ever wanted to grow But pictures can't show that growth I don't think I'm as happy as I try to make it seem But I know I'm not as sad as I used to be And if I'm onto something, let me make it clear You can only grow from here
6.
You've got a bone to pick with me But you pick my bones from your teeth Your tongue tinged with medicine I'm what the doctor ordered, prescription One a day if you'd like But take as many to relieve the pain I play in your mouth, you think to spit me out But I'm already making my way down your throat Now, You already don't know How, What you were so angry about Now, Before Now You tell me not to park outside, Sneaking out; you don't want to wake him You'll meet a block down the street Avoid the eyes of your curious neighbor I guess I should have known But then again I really just don't care As long as you keep reclining My seat, the windows fogging Maybe we can keep meeting like this Now, we shouldn't be allowed How, do I explain to your husband Now, this business Now Cos you're at home and I'm alone When you tell me to come over And you're undressed when I'm downstairs And you're alone when I come over I tangle your hair in my hands Little knots that you will have to brush out You're breathing right into my mouth I give your life a little sense of adventure But I know that you're upset And I'm probably using you to my advantage But you never say it, so I wont ask a question, Your marriage never worked out in the end Now, won't say it out loud How, do I decide to take his place Now, by your side Now Cos you're at home and I'm alone When you tell me to come over And you're undressed when I'm downstairs And you're alone when I come over
7.
Small Spaces 03:27
I burned my hand trying to prove a point I said "they're sturdy" but the tears start to come out And you didn't know how to help me out So you kept your eyes to the ground But then I lit another fire work And it didn't hurt as much as I secretly wish it did I couldn't look you In the eye I knew I shouldn't even try Cos I would have told you right then and there How my hand was aching and I needed to move away For my sake, or maybe I'd get stuck Complicated, living in small spaces I should've kicked this habit so long ago But sounds like you know it too Living in small spaces

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It's all about the emotional release after it's all over

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released November 5, 2019

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Another Step Brother New Jersey

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another step brah

i make music using three chords

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